What happens when you forget their name?

If you atend a lot of networking functions on a regular basis, you might run into a very common challege:  remembering the people you meet. The biggest challenge I hear when coaching clients is remembering people’s names.

Maybe this sounds familiar to you:  You attend a monthly networking function and someone approaches you who looks familiar  and has obviously met you before.  They remember you, even use your name, and you…draw a blank.  Rest assure this happens to everyone (even me on occasion).  And to add to that challenge, what happens when you forget their name, but you want to introduce them to someone else you are talking to?

Fortunately, I was able to ask an expert opion on how to handle this.  Last week I had the pleasure of participating in a teleseminar as a part of a Silver Mastermind program I am a part of that is facilitated by marketing expert Alexandria Brown.  Her guest was Anna Post, great-great granddaughter of Emily Post.  Anna shared a lot of great etiquette tips related to business and I took pages and pages of notes.  However, when it came time to questions, I was lucky enough to jump in and ask the proper way to handle this challenges of  forgetting people’s names.  Here’s what Anna had to say:

If it’s someone you don’t know well, but feel like you should know their name:  Simply “fess up”.  you can say something simple like, “I’m so sorry, I’m drawing a blank right now, could you please remind me of your name?”  Just apologize and “fess up” quickly and then move on – don’t go back to it.

If it’s someone you have met on more than one occasion or is someone who’s name you REALLY SHOULD know: The best advice is to just “sail through” it – it will actually show confidence in your professionalism if you’re honest that you can’t remember their name.  You can simply say something like, “I’m so sorry – of course I should know your name, but my mind is drawing a blank – why is that?”  Being upfront that you’re only human and you’ve forgotten their name will help you avoid being “called out” that you forgot their name – which is far more embarrassing.

It sounds like Anna’s advice is to treat it like ripping off a bandaid – just acknowledge the problem, address it, and move on.  Great advice!

One way I work on remembering names when meeting people for the first time is to use their name immediately after they say it.  If they say, “I’m Bob”, then I work their name into my own introduction, and might say, “Nice to meet you Bob, I’m Barbara”.  If it’s a name I think I might have trouble remembering, I’ll try to use it a couple more times in the conversation.  Try it, it helps.

Don’t beat yourself up if you can’t remember someone’s name.  Be graceful and you’ll be respected for your professionalism.

(c) 2008 Barbara Beal-Lopez, “The Elevator Pitch Coach” with Brightfarm Productions helps business professionals introduce themselves with high impact.  Everything in business starts with an introduction.  If you’re ready to introduce yourself and your business professionally and comfortably, visit Barbara at www.brightfarm.com and sign up for free weekly tips.